summarized, my (online) best friend is gay, but he keeps giving mixed signals and now im always overthinking.ive loved him for over a year now... almost two. i worry ive been a little too overbearing sometimes. we're closer than ever, and hes said himself that he trusts me more than anyone else. weve gone through thick and thin, even when both of us havent had anyone else to turn to. ive even been with him as he experienced a relationship with someone else, despite the fear i felt about being replaced. since then he has moved on from that relationship, despite the rocky breakup. im very proud of him. but... he keeps giving off mixed signals about our friendship. he has stated before that he isnt interested, yet the things he says/does constantly make me question both myself and him. theyre usually small things, like saying that he loves hearing my voice and being on calls together, or that he cant wait until i come to visit so we can finally hug one another in person. once i saw him make a doodle of my persona (we're both artists), and when he posted it on instagram, there were small hearts around the portrait that hadnt been there when he first sent it directly. these are only a few moments out of many.i feel like this sounds pathetic. i know he doesnt want to be in a romantic relationship with me, so why do i keep re-evaluating his position on this? im fine with staying friends, but the lack of consistency makes my head hurt. i love him, really... i dont want to keep chasing something that doesnt exist.