Hi this is my story.
I am thirteen and I’ve never been happy with life my parents divorced when I was 5 and my dads girlfriend died a long painfull death of cancer on my birthday when I was 8
weve never addressed it and I keep all my thoughts I’m my head and it’s making me crazy. I’m pretty sure my dad has a disorder where he can’t show emotions bc we aren’t close and my sister who is 18 doesn’t see him anymore because he cheated on my mum and his dying girlfriend with multiple ppl he’s basically a shit person
for some odd reason I still see him even though I hate him he makes me so deprived of happiness and I hate him.
school is a whole different story it has given me panick attacks and sometimes I’ve thrown up It makes me want to kill myself
this is the only place I thought would be ok to adress this stuff nobody cares about me and I feel extremely alone I self harm and sometimes just punch and smash my head into the wall multiple times a day and cut . I don’t know why I’m so depressed I just am the world is just so toxic and I feel as if there is nothing good in my way in the future I’ll probably end up dead
because I want to kill myself as I think it is the only way out I don’t give a shit if it makes my family sad I hate living I hate living so much but I don’t know how to do it I want it to be quick
but yeah that’s my story I know it’s pretty boring I don’t think I’ll be a live much longer ... goodbye