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2 months ago

in need of help, (tw mention of self harm)


i was in a relationship for 5 months and i lied about my age by a year, i did it due to past trauma to protect myself, it’s hard to explain but basically they found out and we finished on bad terms, they have found someone else which i am happy about. but i still live with this guilt even after apologising continuously & saying why i did something like that. i need help on ways i can stop feeling like this. we no longer talk & and they are with someone else so it wouldn’t be a good idea messaging them again and apologising, frankly i don’t want to be apart of their life and they don’t want to be apart of mine. our relationship was toxic i was dealing with a lot mentally, they used to go out and say they would kill themselves at 4 in the morning and would later respond to me later the next day with i’m fine. i was never aloud to talk about the way i felt, i was too scared to upset them due to the way they were feeling and doing something bad to themselves, i noticed they only did things like this when i was mentally drained or having second thoughts about the whole thing. it was toxic. but please someone tell me what i can to overcome this guilt and live a better life.