Scared to be committed

When I was in junior high, I happen to meet this guy named Jayden.

He's popular while I'm just a nobody but I was shock when he confessed his feelings towards me.

I let him court me for months but when I finally said yes, a month after he confessed something that changed my life since then.

He said that he's cheating on me with some other girl and he's guilty on me so he broke up with me.

That was the first heartbreak I ever had. since then I can't seem to talk to other guys who likes me without thinking that they might do the same mistakes that he did.

because honestly, I don't want to be in pain again because of the same reason.

that's why I stayed single for years and just realize that what happened between me and Jayden was not even real to begin with.

We were not an official couple as I thought we were haha that hurts me even more though years already pass but still it haunts me.

I can't seem to commit with someone without overthinking.

maybe I was lacking

or is it because of my appearance


I don't know.. it just keep running to my head. I keep feeling insecure that's why I distance myself from having an affair with someone I really like. 'cause I always thought that if that person hurt me more than twice maybe he's not serious about me. haha

so tell me, do I still have the chance to be with someone?