I'm absolutely terrified to fall in love or to even like someone. I caught myself a few days ago starting to pique interest/like one of my friends and I immediately feel the need to push them away and isolate myself. I hate showing my feelings and emotions. I don't know what to do because on the inside I want to be loved and feel loved and to love someone, but I don't know I'm just scared of everything and getting hurt? I'm not sure anymore I'm just really confused on why I feel the need to push people away over something as little as this. I just want to be able to love someone and not feel this guilty need of pushing someone away. I wanna feel loved and to be held but at the same time, I hate it and want no one to touch me. Does that make any sense? I don't know what to think anymore lol but just thought I should put it out here because maybe someone can relate or even give me some advice. Thanks.