3 months ago
Time Spent- 11m
14 Visitors

An endless loop

Right exactly from the movie masaan , " ye dukh kaahe khatam nahi hota be".

Kayi baar mere haath num padh jaate hai,aakhe dhundhli padh jaati hai.

Aakhe bhari huyi hai par

Aasuo ko rokk nahi paati .

Lockdown mai jab mujhe kayi mahino baad pyaar hua toh mohabbat ke saath saath bande ne bhi use kar liye. Meri masoomiyat aur meri pure intentions ke.

Aur ab ,jab zindagi mai meri pyaar karne ki umeed marr gayi thi

Ek banda aake apni mohabbat ka izhaar kar deta hai , aur kuch shano mai ,mai uske pyaar mai girne hi waali thi ke unhone bhi wahi dohara diye.

Wahi pal ,wahi zidd,wahi mushkilen ,wahi dard aur vahi hasske chale jaana.

Jab mai bejaan laash ki tarah giri mili unke kaatilaana iraade se mari huyi toh unhone haath deneke wajah mazaak udaaya.


Ab toh yu lagta hai ki baat sirf iss par hi khatam hai.

Aage nahi karna hume koi ishq ,nahi dil dena,nahi saaso mai unhe basana, nahi shaadi ke khwaab dekhna ,nahi khwaab bunn ne unke saath ab.

Ab shayad mai na kar pau voh pyaar fir kabhi,kyuki mohabbat ke voh saare dard, hassi kuch der tak hi thik hai.

Pata nahi meri aur mohabbat ki kyu banti nahi.

Aaj baato baato mai baat nikal aayi ,khud ko jalase ki aas bahar nikal aayi.

Ye dard itna gehra hai ki harr raat,harr pal maine khudko jalate juye dekha hai.


Pata hai usne mujhe dil par lovebite diya hai

Shaam tak mai usse dekh bohot sharmayi fir shaam tak uska message nahi aaya toh voh hasi meri badal gayi aur insecurities bharte bharte ek mayusi ka aangan ban gayi.


Insecurities:

Kahi mai moti toh nahi thi uske liye, kaash mai ye sab kaat du churi se fir voh mujhe apna le.

Kahi voh mujhe use karne toh nahi aaya tha.

Kahi usne mera mms toh nahi banaya.

Kahi maine shave nahi kiya tha isiliye pasand nahi aayi.

Kya mai bed pe achi nahi hu.

Kya ye sab uske liye ek khel ya mazaak tha.


Mai roz bhagwaan se dua karna chahti hu ke bass ab dard na de,bass ab khatam kar. Bula le tere pass ya ye ghum hata de.