I've run out of ways to describe my ineptitude. I'm one of those people that have received enough opportunity that I should have been more successful. But every time someone gives me an opportunity, I start counting down the days until they realize I have nothing to offer except a smile and a crazy laugh. There was a time I convinced myself I'm a writer - I think I wanted a sense of purpose so I went with what I like even though I wasn't really good at it - now every time people see me they ask about a career that I'd never maintain because I'm too dumb. My memory is shit. And I can't create for shit. I wake every morning feeling like this world repels me. I wake every morning hoping God finally found the most appropriate planet to place. I wake up to the reality that I'm still useless, gravely untalented and as a bonus, I carry crippling anxiety. I've stopped trying to take my life or praying for death cos neither works, and I don't want my family to have to deal with grief. Although secretly, I think they also know that I may just be a perpetual black sheep. I convinced myself life gets better when you're older. The truth is, it gets worse. When you're younger, people fight for you, and forgive when you make mistakes. When you're older they need to see your value without asking.
Being an UnRemarkable is sad. You're bothered by your own lack, but you can't do jack shit to fix it.
I may get fired in a month or so, because no matter what I do, I don't perform well in. Lol. It's a cosmic joke. The more I try, the more I prove to be an existential mistake.
If you have a talent or marketable skill, please use it. Even if you hate this world, at least hate it And prove it wrong. Some of us seem have been built as common pots used only for common purpose.