3 months ago
Time Spent- 1h 5m
45 Visitors

argh. i really messed up. bad.

I noticed way too late that someone younger than me got emotionally attached to me. She was sayinh I was like,, her savior for talking her out of suicide when I noticed her concerning status on discord and stuff like that. She kept trying to do nice things for me like make art or write fanfic. i didnt pressured her into giving me things but I still feel horribly guilty. Stopping the close friendship was necessary, and I did not realize I was endorsing it, and I really feel like an asshole . I think I made a good decision, but now she feels like I have abandoned her. I really cant, since we are both admins on the same discord server, but I have distanced myself from her. She is angry that I stopped talking to her as much. And i understand that. But I had to stop it. I had to. It was wrong of me to allow her to get attached in the first place. I just wish I focused on my IRL friendships and problems. the guilt surrounding this has overtaken me and I can't focus on anything anymore. I feel horrible. Argh. I feel like I deserve to be cancelled for causing this person so much pain. I am trying to draft an apology letter but its so so hard. I need to word it correctly. Im losing my mind. I keep texting mental health helplines but they keep stopping mid conversation. I just feel so alone even though my friends and family are here to support me. I just know they have high standards, and I dont know if they would forgive me for someone getting hurt because of me :( I don't deserve them.

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3 months ago

Re: argh. i really messed up. bad.

yeah. I feel so bad i just want to reverse the last two months i want to undo it so bad but I cant i did such horrible things I allowed too much. god. i dont think im a dangerous person but i still hurt someone. im never going to be like this again but,, my god

This sounds kinda over the top to me. What's really going on?...................................................................... ........ ..................................fjejrrhrururuchhddjrirjrrjrjeiri49ririririttkfkfjfhdjehehebheheyeuehehdbfj3hebahwjdjjd hu which business qui wi tracy xgyisitsr7drustusruwww47w47s47a57zrus57wsru5