So I’ve had suicidal thoughts since 9th grade. Didn’t act on them in any way, just had them.Thought they were completely normal for everyone, they weren’t. Would be weekly, and they slowly increased throughout high school. Mainly cause of self worth and all that sad shit. I’m just recently graduated. So tomorrow I planned on killing myself, August 8th, because my favorite number is 8 and it’s the 8th month. I don’t wanna die I just want something, someone to live for. I lost this girl that was so perfect, I don’t have a plan for my life, I’m not good at anything and I’m never enough for anything or anyone. I’m not looking for pity, I’m looking for help. I don’t wanna leave my family like this, not now. How do I feel like I matter again? At this point I’ll take anything, I’m desperately looking for a reason to live.