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So i have a bestfriend 'X' and I'm not quite sure if she really cares about me. I am good at singing and I get selected for a lot of events and stuff while she is very good in studies. She's basically a topper and not into extra curricular activities as such. Last Christmas my band and I performed on stage . Everyone said that the performance was very nice but she said that it was so difficult for them to hype up the audience from backstage. She mocks me for being friends with my music buddies. But at the same time she also helps me with my studies and other things. So I don't really know what's going on in her head.I mean i know that being jealous is human and it's ok but can someone please help me with this?

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Re: Bestfriend?

I was just going to say that it sounds like she is jealous. Maybe she is worried that you spending time with other people is going to affect your friendship with her. Does she have any other friends? If not, maybe she is worried about you leaving her. But if she isn’t a very good friend to you and is controlling and puts you down for what you like then it is okay to want to leave her. But if she is someone you want to keep in your life then maybe reassure her that you may have other friends but she is still important to you and you hope things are going okay for her. Maybe ask what things are going on with her, and if she has any personal struggles she is afraid of talking about. A lot of people have stuff going on and instead of opening up they tend to act differently to the people they are close to, such as being controlling or hurtful or even angry towards you. But don’t forget to prioritise yourself first. If she is toxic to you and harming your mental health then she is not worth you following after her.

Maybe she's jealous just your relationship wtih music band friends and not your voice or success? I mean maybe she doesn't want you to have other "best" friends? It is very common that some people doesn't want to share their friends. And that's why she might said those thing about your successfull performance.

Don't know girl, that's my best guess. :/

Maybe she's jealous of your talent because she lacks that and maybe she just sees something in them you don't and she's worried but explaining it wrong, she also could be just jealous of them for spending time with you (yes there are people like that who want you to be only their friend) and maybe she thinks she's better than you and the band so she tries to belittle you and your performance

It could be many things, idk if you should talk to her about it tbh but if you don't, time will tell be patient :)

It is sad that your best friend isn’t able to be there for you. Look at it from her perspective you are getting support love and adoration and these are things that she wants herself herself. You might offer some of these to her to show your appreciation for what she’s offering you.

However, if she continues to tear you down and not help to bolster up your self-esteem which is what she supposed to do as your friend, you will have to eject her toxic mess from your life.

It’s a hard decision but the sooner you learn to leave toxicity behind, the better your life will be. Or else, you will end up having people around you who to your face will tell you everything is fine but behind your back they will criticise you. Start adopting a zero tolerance policy on that from now on.