I'm trying my hardest to stay positive and calm but I'm really close to just slashing my skin open and bleed out. I can't trust anyone. My bestfriend/soulmate hasn't been feeling any better and he hasn't been talking to me much because of his overwhelming shitty feelings. I'm so fucking worried. I know I shouldn't vent to him right now cuz he's dealing with his own shit but I really just want someone to vent to. I don't have anyone else. I can't trust my mom since she has the mindset of a boomer. My siblings are way too young to deal with heavy shit. None of the things I find enjoyable are helping. I can't draw, write, fantasize, nothing. I'm hoping I don't wake up tomorrow or at least be comatosed for a few weeks. Six years of bullshit is really getting to me now lol.