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can this be my final goodbye to you?

i honestly dont know what to say to you...my feelings has been so confused with you lately and i dont know why...

maybe there are things that i still need to sort things out...ive been having dreams of you lately...some of them, you coming back and wanting to start over...others are just you randomly talking to me and then you disappear...ive also been hearing these signs from the universe and all...but i doubt that you'll step forward and reconnect...i guess youre happier with someone else now...it's fine. im not mad or jealous...im happy for you, really...i guess i just dont like the loneliness from time to time...i mean, the hoess are doing their best to help me because you asked them to get me through this...im grateful that theyre helping me even though im sometimes someone who's hard to deal with...im glad youre doing great at least...youre finally happy with someone new.

i guess i still need some more healing to do...idk what went wrong with me. i guess i just needed to write this down to at least get some pain out of my chest...for the time being...you're birthday is also in like 2 or 3 days...advance happy birthday instead. i wish you all the best...even if you broke my heart so much...im still cheering for you...from afar...


i love you...ading...