Was sexually abused by my step-brother for years, everytime I had to go to my dad's. As much as I hate him for it he is the same age and it started when I was 4 or 5. Someone had to have done it to him too.He would touch me, and shove his dick down my throat. Didn't matter where we were, on car rides he would sit in the middle and put my hand down his pants, vacations, but mostly late at night. It continued for years, until 12 ish when I finally started kicking his ass.Looking back my dad has always paid unnatural attention to children. I also know my mom accused him of touching me. The most shame I hold is somewhere in there before I learned it was wrong, I thought it was love, I enjoyed it. My wife knows that I was abused but not the details. I certainly have never admitted that last part. I'm tired of it eating me alive. I didn't choose for it to happen. I was a child, I didn't know it was wrong. As an adult I'm scared of the dark and hate being touched. I don't want it to control me anymore.