Ughh ... At the end of the day , all i can say is its my own fault. I can't be mad at you for it. I'm to blame , i dont deserve you or to be with anyone. My harsh but truthful reality. All i can do is try to make peace with it and try to find some type of happiness in something other then love or having a family.. Might help me stop being soo unmotivated with life. I feel like the past few years just flew by. N ive just been dwelling in the past , depressed , well more depressed .Funny thing is not one person has said anything to me about it . maybe im really good at hiding it or no ones comfortable talking to me about it or no one cares. One of thee above .Way it seems to me. I'm a selfish person for thinking i could find happiness being with someone .I'm responsible for my own happiness n if i cant be happy on my own then im just f**ked .