Please dont judge but i really just needa explain to someone.
I am practically a child (13). I get extremely emotional but i havent cried for the sake of my family. If they see that ive been crying they would ask why. I have no reason why other than i have depression and get mood swings. My parents are super nice and im scared they would put me in therapy because of it. Im so sick of holding my tears inside of me when all i want to do is cry. Theres so many things going on in the world right now and i really am stressed. Nobody knows how aware i am of the BLM protests and gay protesting too. Im so sick of this pain in my heart. I feel like its going to fall apart any minute.
Another thing is i feel like i like girls, i also feel like i like guys. The thing is though.... I never feel attracted to any girls because i know at my private school nobody is lesbian or bi. Whenever i see an attractive girl or guy online or on social media i never feel that way because I know im way too young for them. Its so confusing to me what to do.
I feel like i dont like having a gender too. I dont want to be seen as female or male. I just want to be myself, but i dont know how to explain to my parents. Im fine with she/her pronouns so i dont even know if i should tell anyone because it will just make things complicated. Im venting so hard right now and i dont know what to do anymore. Im glad finally got to tell someone even if you're across the world right now.