I am always unhappy why I am not like this, I do not know what he does not know. I want to be at the top level in life but it does not happen to me that I cannot do what I want to do, I am a little weak in studies, I wanted to be a doctor first but due to being weak I could not take science then I was 12th I didn't want to be hated. Then taking his political science on seeing his friend did not even feel good. I never felt like becoming a friend, I have not been my friend for a long time because I was a weak student so I do not have a true friend today except my family I was watching myself losing at every turn. I am sad with myself. I started watching dirty videos, accidentally watched TV Couples while romancing, then I didn't know anything about them. My mind wanted to see them all. I started watching sex videos on YouTube and left it for 2 months and never saw it after leaving for 1 month, I got used to watching all these things, then people think about how dirty people are and how they have made themselves put away I Started taking career tanstionI have no idea what to do in life. When I am confused, I am hobby of drawing but I do not like it. Someone tells me something, I feel very bad. I feel like why I told me. I keep thinking about the same, I do not understand what to do. Want to do something for myself.I too have to be self-reliant, I have to make a boyfriend, but I have to live my life on my own terms but how. Then I go back to thinking about people thinking about my parents. Then I am not beautiful in thinking that I have more height, who will love me. True love is not love can't understand what to do, I have the most tension.