So I hooked up with this guy I already knew since a long time. First time it was with no penetration as it was pretty spontaneos and we didn't have condoms. He kind of insisted on going all the way, I kept explaining why it's very important to me that we don't. I told him I'm bothered by this and the next day he really apologized and realized he acted like a jerk, thanked me for explaining him so detailed, etc.
Our next date, we had a drink in the park and than went to his place. When we layed down I suddenly felt very drunk and a bit sick. I told him I'm sorry, but I'm not in a state of doing anything, even if I would've wanted, I really needed to just lay there. At first he brought me water and was caring of me. But then we somehow ended up having sex, no condom. It's blurry to me, I feel like I was half asleep, half awake. I remember at some point I sort of enjoyed it, another moment I realized what was happening and told him to stop.
I sort of feel raped. I'm a bit afraid.