I'm so angry nowadays, like, very very angry and unmotivated. I don't if i have depression, but i do know i have anxiety, or maybe not. Im constantly worrying about things and about myself but idk. My family doesn't really care about things like this, because all they see is that im still young and i can't be feeling these way. But i came across on some article of odd symptoms, and i read all of it, and i realised i'vr been doing that since when our family issues started. I'm not like this before, i was always cleaning and very cheerful idk. Also, it also said on the article that it applies on childs, and i am a child. Im the younger one on our siblings. Im not really educated like my older siblings, their childhoods are great, well except my third sibling, she had depression when she was younger, but she's doing good now. But honestly, i want to ask her personal things like depression, anxiety and also this disorder, because i know she'd been through alot. But she don't even understand me when i gave her signs that i have anxiety, that i don't want to go cause i worry about what people think of me, i want to be ignored by people but here she goed screaming to me when i just want to come home and cry because everyone is looking at us. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to hurt them, and i don't want to throw things on them because i know that they would just hurt me back more with their words. Especially my middle sister, she hit me since i was 9 or maybe 7? Im now 11, and she still hits me when she's mad. I can't hurt her, so i just hurt myself when im alone in my room. I want to self harm myself, but i can't do it, because i think that they would scream at me that, "why did you this to yourself?" like they did on my older sister. The thing is that i have strict parents. Our mom is abroad, and our father live with us. We don't have our mom to teach us how to do this, what is this, that's why i've been on Internet alot so i can teach my self when i grew up. My father doesn't teach us, yeah he lecture us with this, but he never even make a change with his self. I don't know what to do anymore.