Does love exist....

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I've had my first love when I was pretty much young I wasn't mature enough to handle it and as a result it ended in only 8 months but still so many years later I think of him. I don't know if that was called love or not after him I still regret for doin what I did with a guy. I used a guy to get over him just for two days and I didn't know the guy I used I was his first love. Sometimes I think I can never get over my first love but then boom I'm over him. Now I have a crush on my cousin who doesn't give a crap about me and it hurts but usually my crushes don't last long and I end up thinking of my first love who did dirty to me for other girl though I was young but I don't why does it hurt very much and I think of the guy whom I did so dirty just for a pretty path of a life I hope he gets someone who he deserve. And I don't know if I'll ever be able to love anyone for me true love/ love only exist in movies what human do is compromisation.

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