Today I realized I am officially the dumbest woman on the planet. I literally was told that if I don't get an abortion if I were to accidentally get pregnant I will be a fucked up person for wanting to keep it since he doesn't want to commit (but he still wants sex) .. and if I got rid of it I would honestly hate him forever. You see this guy has a child with another woman and he had that kid with her. So do not try to tell me that I'm wrong for wanting the same reassurance. Yes, I know that they split up, but at least she wasn't forced to choose between giving it up in order to stay in a relationship and be stable (they were together for 3 years). No. I'm gonna be at a fucking loss of words if I get knocked up because my life will officially be over. Unless he wants it or changes his mind, as far as we are concerned after having our conversation tonight that if I get pregnant accidentally, our relationship is absolutely nothing and it's up to me to take care of the situation. I'm tired. And I'm wasting my life being unhappy but I'm ignoring it.If you're a woman and you're like me in a situation like this please let me know you exist. I appreciate this being read its like some is actually listening..Also, don't be like me and end up settling. I'm done searching for love I've chosen my battles and life is just gonna play itself out. But that's my laziness. I'm letting life control the outcome of my fate.As a conclusion, I am definitely an idiot 🙃 and I'm falling asleep with him tonight in his arms. Thanks for the read.