ED tw eating disorders

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im sorry but I really can’t hold this in anymore. Four people in my friend group including myself have suffered from an eating disorder. Mainly anorexia but also a binge ED. I lost one of my friends because of it she’s not dead she just left. Six people tried to help her but Idk if we did something wrong we all tried to help her eat more and make her get help. She’d send us pics of what she ate everyday and everyday we would get into arguments with her about how she wasn’t eating enough. I think we were too forceful but idk how else we could have done it bc I feel like she wouldn’t have listened any other way. But one day she had enough and just said Fuck you to us and left. And I can’t forgive her because she also affected the rest of us. Not necessarily me but one of my friends, let’s call her, she’s started saying says stuff like “I’m jealous of her” and “she ruined my life” but she won’t open up about the specifics. Every time A mentions it I try to help her open up about it but it doesn’t work. I don’t know what I should do. I’m so fucking scared that she’s having thoughts about starving herself or anything like that I’m literally crying writing this because I’m so scared I can’t sleep at night because of it. A’s been trying to lose weight for a few months now and she’s been doing it in a healthy way but lately it’s been a little hard and she’s been stuck a certain weight. She always says taht she’s eating enough but I’m so sure she has bad thoughts about food when we hang out she eats enough but Ik how it feels to have those thoughts about food and sometimes it gets out of control. I’m speaking from experience one of the biggest reasons I’m so worried about her is because Ik that I lied about my eating disorder for a very long time. I told my friends that Id gotten a lot better over the summer like 2 yrs ago but truth is I ended up relapsing when I came back and it was so bad. All of Ninth grade I starved myself and binge ate a cycle over and over again. But then the summer or ninth when I found out my friend that left had an ED I decide to actually recover and now I’m doing rlly well but Ik that it took me 3 yrs to do that. A told me today when I asked her to talk about the problems she’s having that’s it’s too late for her and I really don’t want her to go through the same thing I did. To lie to her friends about her thoughts about food and let it get out of control. If anyone has any advice pls help me I need someone to help me feel less alone in it. Thank you






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