6 months ago
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Fading friendship

I have a best friend of three years and we have been through thick and thin and adventures and we did everything together. But he was never the person to say he has a best friends because he is more the 20 good friends over a great friend guy. But I know that we were closer than anyone else he knew, and all his other friendships were really shallow but we had real conversations and experiences. We even find ways to meet up all the time during lockdown. So now he randomly starts acting cold to me and even over text he was very abrupt and not his usual self, so I asked him about it (over text) and he said that I was acting different and that I was changed a bit. I didnt feel that at all so I was really confused, we had a convo and it was wierd but it was fine I guess, then two weeks ago he is acting weird again, I text him and he says we should take a break, I was confused and sad and we had big convo and he said some really hurtful things like he didn't like the new me, basically he said I had changed and mentioned a period in which it happened, I knew why. It was the period that I overcame my year long depression and was happy and had a better outlook on life. Which I don't know how but something about me being happy made him not like me. Since two weeks ago and that convo he has had a few get togethers and things and has stopped inviting me and is acting wierd around me. I know fair well he feels different about me now and would take any of his fake friends over me now. Its hurtful because its subtle. And I know that I am the only real one, and because I didnt feel any change in our dynamic and ways and then he suddenly is wierd. I have serious fomo issues and I know that so as soon as someone is sort of moving on and not with me I expect them to be out having fun all the time. And because he was my only real friend it hurts to know he doesn't care about me anymore, he was the only stable and comforting thing in my life and now it's dissipating. I feel like im going to fall back in to depression. Im even seeing someone new and I dont even care anymore I just want us to be back to normal. I know we need to have a big conversation and really let it all out but I know him and after that he wont see me the same ever again and will be too awkward around me to hang again. I dont wanna fall back in.

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6 months ago

Re: Fading friendship

Umm....I know this is weird but this is exactly what is happening to me.

This is crazy. I have been going through this rough patch with my best friend. She is saying, I have changed and asks me if I there is something wrong me and to be honest, I have never been in a better place where I am doing all the right things and good things are happening but when I talk to her, she just talks in such a way that it makes me feel like a burden somehow, idk.

Yeah its wierd I feel like you always hear people saying cut out the toxic people in your life and I thought maybe thats how he feels about me but then I realised im the one sticking by him, he has been annoying and hard to deal with at times but I don't complain but now he is the one complaining, so I realised hes the one being toxic to me and its the other way round. Im gonna give him space and maybe try get back into it again in a bit but im not hopefully. Otherwise we have to move on "cut them out" because we arent the ones in the wrong, friends have rough patches but you deal with it or have a convo, Otherwise its not healthy. We arent the toxic ones, I guess our friendship isnt worth enough to deal with a bit of change. So its best to try and move on I guess