14 days ago
Time Spent- 3m
11 Visitors

Fake smile

faking a smile is so fuxking tiring. You wake up everyday just to wipe away the dried tears that left your puffy eyes the night before, only to cover your true emotions with a fake smile. Sad part is...everyone around you believes it. They believe every laugh or every “I’m fine” that comes from you. It’s so exhausting to have to lie just to not worry anyone around you. It’s a pain to have too keep all of your emotions bottled up inside, to afraid that if you pilled up your own problems onto someone else, they will think you’re overreacting or simply being too sensitive and annoying. Behind that forced smile, you’re broken, lost and tired, Crying and yelling in the inside, just hoping for someone to save you from the darkness that’s eating you alive every second of every day. You put on a fake mask, a fake bright smile everyday. Soon those days become weeks and those weeks turn into months...but after a while it becomes harder to fake your emotions. You’re losing yourself completely, the faith and hope you were holding on for dear life soon starts to fade away...leaving you with nothing left. Skipping meals starts to become a daily routine, feeling disgusted and crying at your own reflection started to feel normal. You hated yourself, you hated the fact you can’t breathe in your own skin anymore. You hated everyone for not hearing your pleads for help. Soon enough cutting was like a toxic hobby that sometimes got out of hand. Every bottle of pills your eyes laid on, started to call out for you...trying to get you to end it all. “Fake it till you make it” people often say but the more you faked it the more you lost yourself. (This is how I feel idk about most people but I just needed to let I all out, thank you for reading)