That morning 08/13/2012, 4 days after my birthday 1 day after his , we were different you wouldn't even look at me you spent the morning on your phone doing who knows what. Me I sat there and watched you, my phone in your pocket. It came time for us to leave time for us to get the most unexpected news. Now I don't know why I remember that day it could be one of two reasons but I could swear this only happened yesterday. Sitting in the room waiting for the doctor to come back with the results you finally spoke...those words running in and out of my ears I couldn't believe it. I wanted to run out of the room and never see you again. Just as I found the words to express how much I hated you how much I never wanted to see you again in came the doctor head down. Disappointed. I was pregnant. I couldn't help but cry and It wasn't a happy cry. Yes that sounds awful but how could I have a baby with a man that just told me he no longer loved me ,that he had been cheating on me for months. Yet alone a man that never needed an excuse to hit me. The rest of the visit all I could think was I had to get out if not for me for my baby. We didn't make it half way home before the fight started. I remember sitting at the red light waiting for it to turn green so I could get home and start packing. The next thing I knew my head was bouncing off the window. I never saw it coming but at this point everything was a little blurry. The light turned green but I couldn't move. My eye sight far from perfect my ears ringing. I couldn't make out the noise. Was it him yelling at me to go was it the radio or was it the man pounding on the window because of what he just witnessed. I rolled down the window just enough to tell him I was fine it was just a misunderstanding. He didn't buy it he knew just as well as I did that things were only going to get worse and boy did they get worse. Walking up the stairs unlocking the door I heard the click knowing once I was inside I may never come back out. The shouting began instantly even the animals knew to hid when he started shouting. The first hit came and before I knew it I had lost count of how many kicks and punches I had taken. I could feel the blood running down my face my throat sore from shouting for help knowing all to well no one was going to save me. I curled up into a ball trying to protect myself when it stopped to afraid to look up all I could hear was the sounds of someone knocking on the door. Shocked I untuck my head my eyes scrambled but found him instantly I could do nothing but observe as he walked to the window to see who dared knock on the door. I found what little strength I had to get up I tried to walk I tried to save myself. I could swear my leg was broken if not my leg a rib or two for sure. I collapsed crying in pain but no voice to scream. Just like that they were gone and again I found myself alone. He was far from done he wasn't going to be happy until I took my last breath. I'm not going to lie I accepted my fate. I took every hit silently and I prayed to die. Once he realized I was numb and did nothing to fight back he stood over me. He had won I had given up on life, but wining is not the same as finishing. He had to make sure he finished what he had started. He kneeled over my stomach, pulled my shirt over my head trapping my arms hiding my face. As I laid pinned to the ground I could feel him shuffling he grabbed all he could. His plan to suffocate me falling in to place. I couldn't breath I couldn't see yet I pictured everyone I loved that was the last thing I remembered before a loud bang. I woke to the sound of an unfamiliar voice. So concerned. At the same time I here him yelling to be let go. This had to be a dream I could swear I was dead. I felt nothing not pain not sadness nothing I was empty or so I thought. Ill never forget his name. The officer that huddled over me making sure I never stopped breathing until the ambulance arrived. I struggled to find the words to tell them I was pregnant but at that point I figured why bother. I was sure I had lost my baby. As they loaded me in the ambulance I saw him I saw his bloody face in the back of the cop car. I saw the lights flashing and the neighbors gathered around to get a glance at what was going on. The EMT holding my hand telling me all was going to be ok. That I was safe. That my baby was going to be safe. I had my doubts I was so close to death I was sure I would feel dead forever. I got to the hospital where they did blood work, they did ultrasounds and it was then I heard the baby's heartbeat, turns out I was 11 weeks pregnant. I cried this time a happy cry. Why happy? I admit I died that day in a way that changed me forever in a way I cant even explain. All I know is that from my metaphorical death came the greatest life I have ever known. A baby that will forever be my savior in more ways then one. She was my reason to be happy so was my reason to find a way to feel alive again.