TRIGGER WARNINGBasically, inflicting and feeling pain turns me on. Especially blood and cutting.This most likely started due to my history with self harm.Not only do i like inflicting physical pain but also emotional pain.I know that the way I treated two of my ex's classifies as emotional abuse.I love it when people feel pain because of me. I also love feeling pain. I have a need for feeling wanted, and dependent on. I need power over others. I love knowing that i have the ability to tear someone apart.Im not sure when all of this got intertwined with my sexual turn on's, but it did.And I know all of this isnt normal. At all.I have self control to a certain degree, id never hurt someone I care about or respect. But I could.