i was exposed to sexual things as a child & i was also touched by a neighbor. this lead me to exploring things way younger than i shouldve. i hadnt really learned boundaries with things or what consent was as it was never taught to me and i never myself got asked for consent. that kind of lead me to one night grinding on my friend and she grinded back on me after a while but at around 16 (incident happened at 14) i realized that there really was no consent with it cause we were just cuddling and i did that and it’s been eating at me for years. we were still friends after and she always invited me over, but that doesn’t mean she was uncomfortable with it. we stopped being friends a few years back around when we were 17cause i moved away and we just lost touch. i think about this often and i really feel terrible about it. i’m 19 now and shes now in another state but i go to her facebook and think about messaging her to apologize but i just feel shameful and it’s hard for me to really even want to bring it up with her. i just feel horrible.