Hi I’m a 24 year old asexual female and I have a big problem. You see I have a lot of anxiety concerning touch. Most of the time a friend or family member’s touch doesn’t bother me, but even then there are limits. In high school a friend of mine was goofing around and picked me up over his shoulder (he didn’t know about my thing about touching). So I was already in a bit of an internal panic, and when he put me down his hand accidentally brushed my butt. At that point I was in tears, I knew it was an accident, he apologized and promised to respect my boundaries from then on, but I was still panicking and crying uncontrollably. When it comes to regular touch I’m uncomfortable but when it comes to anything even resembling intimate touch everything feels so wrong.
Now with that little background knowledge I can get back to the bigger issue. At the doctor’s office I can usually keep quiet about my touch anxiety. I think to myself “this is a doctor it will ok” “this is for your health it’s safe” “don’t panic” when a doctor has to move a piece of clothing or touch me. However I have never had to have a doctor touch any intimate part of my body. In the past I tried to get a Pap test but taking off my underwear set me off and by the time my doc had prepped the tools and was sitting close enough to touch me I was crying so badly she felt she was emotionally scarring me and couldn’t go through with the test.
I have to get this pap, I have some of the symptoms for endometriosis. But I need to find a way to stay calm long enough to get the test. Does anyone else have this problem? What do you do?
I have another pap scheduled for next week I NEED TO BE OVER THIS!!!