I love this man,5 year's together, but I see him as a stranger at times. I look at him and see an enemy that want's to hurt me, constantly attacking me somehow. He does so many things, then he say's I have issues. I don't know what's real anymore. I feel angry right now, I can't stop thinking about why he hates me so much. He could of just left me, but I find myself in this nightmare, were I don't know if I am the delusional or he is :'( This is so hard, why do I feel this way? what can I do it's gone too long, I cant control my anger I become someone else. I felt he was attacking me and humiliating me, and I bashed out on him. I threw a lighter at him and it hit him in the head and little blood came out, please I didn't mean it. I don't know should I call an officer and report it? He's sleeping in his van right now outside the parking area, :'( I can't do this! what do I do? I feel horrible and wish I could reverse it and avoid the conflict to start.Please, help.