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how do u hide it?


can i ask u a ques?

how do u hide your pain?

some hide behind their books

some hide behind their pens

some hide behind their music

some hide behind their smiles and laughter.

Are u okay?

Im fine.

that's all a lie.

No, I wasn't hurt. Nobody hurt me. I think?

My dad died and I know its not a big deal bcs somehow a lot of ppl have felt it. He died when i was little. I was so close to him yet there are things i dont know. Simple things like what his favourite show, favourite animal, the things he likes the most. I know im stupid bcs i dont know these but what can u expect? I was a naive girl. Its just that it hurts a lot. even though its a long time ago. he gives me a lot of attention. I was grateful for that but sometimes i wish he hadnt bcs it hurts. It always hurt. My mom is not close to me. She didn't favor me that much. In her eyes i was a disappointment. Until now, i cant seem to forget him. He makes me feel special even though im not. I just wish he was here. Its sad bcs he cant see me being successful. Its sad bcs he cant see me graduate from school. Its sad bcs he cant see me wearing my doctors coat. Its sad bcs he cant see me getting married and threaten to kill my husband. Its sad bcs i cant see him smiling at me rn.

I believe experiencing your loved ones death is much more worse than getting hurt, don't you think?

I just wanted to say to him

Thank You for the Happiest Days of my life.