So I hate to do this but i need to release what i'm thinking,I have been jealous of my 3 classmates and one of them is my friend. I became obsessed with bts ships fanfiction and like live with it only thinking about it and me.Like I forget everything and only exist for it. Yes i stopped but change my obsession to something else and always mast*rbates every night without my parents knowing. I'm ashamed of myself but now after 3 days of practicing not to overthink, judge people, compare myself to anyone ,don't care about what others might think any many more positive articles to change my mindset. It was a great feeling, I noticed things that I should have back then. But then, my thoughts still eating me up but not as heavy as they were. I want to forgive and forget, and to not think about my classmates thinking when I do something and to really not care at anyone's opinion about me. I don't even really know them yet I was so self-concious on how i should act to them. it sucks to feel this way and i want to be more confident and to love myself more without caring about anyone.