So last year i was Dating my bestfriend sam and one night she was staying in my House and let me explain this first were both Biologically female but i don't like using any sort of pronouns really but if i have to ill use he/him and i was the first female she dated and only for now and shes a complete virgin never really even touched herself me on the other hand is completely different but yeah by terms im kinda a virgin i guess ive masturbated and used toys but never had sex ive sucked dick , ate pussy all those things but never had the favor returned because i never wanted other people to pleasure me anyways she wanted me to have sex with her and we got to the point of heavily makeing out and her kinda humping my thigh i kept asking for her consent and shit like 20+ times but no matter how many times she reassured me and told me she wanted me to be her first i couldnt do it i just couldn't shes one of my closest friends and i didnt wanna take that away from her and i still feel horrible about it.