Hey there,I am a 26 year old lady and I have finally mustered enough courage to express this in words finally. I don't like me family. I live in a joint family in a rural town near Ranchi. We are socially respected, financially comfortable and everyone is well educated.However, the manner in which my family deals with their support staff is inhuman. Theyare made to slog for long hours with little pay and stale chapatties. Plus people say all sort of things to them as a result of ongoing fights between family members and these poor creatures become the dumping ground ift heir toxicity. Despite the financial and social well being they are misers when it comes to giving respect and bonuses. I cannot say a word if anyone says my family don't treat support staff well.That being said that environment at home is toxic, everyday is ornamented with devrani jethani fights and countless cups of gossip. Women in this house fight for all wierd reason it may even be a glass of water. I hate to be associated with them though no one outside home knows their low levels.Elder men in this house are chauvanists and they are very demanding and dominating. In this respect I pity my mom and her jethanis. Throughout childhood I have seen men hurling verbal abuses on their wives when something goes wrong. I cannot get out of the trauma of looking at my drunk father kicking my mom again and again as she dared to answer him back.I have been sacred for so long that it feels like a natural way. Due to this any loud voices around me even in debates makes me anxious till this day.Due to these affairs I can never muster enough courage to invite.my friends or collegues over even though they keep on dropping hints. I cant even cook anything special for my mate because it will be followed by so much of toxic fight in the kitchen that it will turn into poison. Due to this, he feels I dont care for him much and it causes ill feelings time and again. I haven't told him anything out the poor state of affairs inside home due to shame. Its a part of life I want to drain down the flush but can't help it. I hope putting this is writing for teh world to read will help me process it in a better way.