Ever since I left campus, my life has always revolved around work, work work...but all a while, I have just worked with the same company. so, in the beginning of the year, I got a job offer in a different company and country as well and I had to relocate. I resigned from my work place within the required notice day, and off I was ready to go. Unfortunately before I could hop into my flight to next destination, COVID happened and it was declared a pandemic, slowly countries started putting measures in place, borders started closing, airplanes grounded and all travels halted. Boom everything came crushing down in my world. I decided to exercise some little patience to see how the pandemic would escalate, 1st month, 2nd month, still waiting, all the way to the 5th month still waiting. The organisation I was to join, put my contract on hold for it to be effected once I am able to travel and get to the destination. My world stopped, I wake up every morning and I am slowly losing sight of any reason for living, I am jobless now for close to half an year, tried to find any other job but to no avail. I have alot of regrets looking back, the fateful day that I had to resign from my well paying job with great benefits only for me to become jobless. The current company doesn't seem to care, they just keep asking me to wait...but for how long I am going to wait, will I be able to wait long enough to report to that job...I am lost, I am dying slow deep down, I look strong and patient but I have lost all my will to leave... emotionally am done, financially I am straining, psychologically I am done as well. I am defeated of ways to stay sane anymore.