Humans are so vile and they make me sick because you can't even talk to them and most of them sound like bots and they just repeat things. Humans are not bots. Are they? Maybe they are. I was talking to a bot last night and it was on a crisis line. I thought it was a place where you can talk about anything and you can't vent to them. It didn't say anywhere it was for rape or sexual assaults and she was being really rude and didn't even care about what I had to say because she said it was a crisis line for rape and sexual assault and there was no indication on the website and it felt like she was playing games with me. I think it was a girl. She had a girls name but she sounded like a bot mostly. Also she didn't even know me and my situation and she told me to call 911 when I didn't need to and I wasn't doing anything but venting to her and she took me way too seriously and said that I had a mental health issue and she was being rude and all and I thought when you vent you can say anything you want but to her she was being judgmental and critical and kept arguing with me. She took what I told her out of context and it was really frustrating. Talking to this person was a huge waste of time and it made me feel worse and it made me have a panic attack because of what she said. I thought it was a good idea at first but it turns out it wasn't and it makes me so upset that when you go to people you end up wasting your time. Also it sucks how people around me are so rude to me and they are disrespectful to me because they give me dirty looks and make faces at me when you just come in to their space and it was really weird and I wasn't even doing anything. It makes me so mad people are so rude like to that and so disrespectful and again I wasn't even doing anything. It was my space too and I can come there if I please but they treat it like they can be rude to you whenever they feel like. That kind of thing just makes me mad. I don't care what they think or say about me. But it just was weird how people came up to my face and started making faces at me. They do it so you notice and I walked away and such but I felt better knowing that I didn't do anything and I wasn't bothering them and they were just being rude but at the same time I felt sad I was being mistreated for no reason. Yesterday I shut down for a while because of people and this is all the proof I need and more to know that I was right for hating people. Talking to the crisis line and chatting with people is still a waste of time and all the proof I need that you can't reach out to anyone anymore if you need support. I felt lonely but no matter who I talk to they always end up arguing and being rude to me and disrespectful and they try to act like they are right and it is just more people that are pathetic and more proof that people are vile and disgusting. No matter who I go to it and it just turns out that people are pathetic all over again. My family is pathetic and they make me sick because I am not doing anything and I am not talking to them but they talk to me and they demand my attention and I don't have to give it to them and at the same time they aren't respectful to me. I hate my Mom, Dad, Sisters, and my whole entire family because they are just horrible. I think all of them are narcissistic and they all think they are entitled to give their opinions when I didn't ask for it and I wasn't talking to them in the first place. I am not related to my family and I think I am adopted. I always had that feeling but the feeling had come up more recently because of how I how they have treated me. I don't know why they treat me poorly and I have some guesses but I don't know for sure. I am not taking it personally and I know it is not my problem. Again I am just venting to get it off my chest. That is why I am talking about it and otherwise it would be bottled up inside. I hate people because you can't tell anyone how you feel because they judge you and criticize how you say things and it is a frustrating experience. I am not doing anything wrong and I am minding my own business. I am being myself and I am not hurting anyone. They give their opinions but no one knows anything about my situation and etc and they still say something. I am sick of that because they end up saying things that ruin everything. Also people tell me their opinions but it is not what I believe in. I am open minded but they force their opinions on to me and they try to get me to agree and believe the same things they do. I don't like that and that happens pretty much everyone I talk to. Humans are so vile and they make me sick because every person I have encountered in the past have tried to brainwash me and tried to make me conform to their believes and their opinions for forced upon me. Thank goodness I didn't agree and believe them and go thing I wasn't foolish enough to get brainwashed because I know better and all. I am just appalled at the fact they would try to do such a thing. That is not the only reason people are vile and disgusting. It is the people who want you to do what they want and live the life they want to for you when it isn't their life and it's mine. They tell you what to do and not to do. It is more manipulation and control from the so called pathetic human race. I don't anything like that to anyone. I don't care about anyone but myself. I don't love anyone but myself. I don't understand anyone but myself. I don't want to help anyone but myself. I don't have any empathy for anyone but myself. I made the right decisions and choices and I am doing well in my life and I am really successful, I am strong, and powerful. My life is good no matter what. I am happy and content most of the time. It is just everything good I ever feel goes away when I am around another human being and then I start to get angry. I don't listen to anyone and I don't believe what others say. I don't take things personally. I don't care what people think. I don't let anyone hurt me or bother me. I don't let anyone insult me or anything. I just am miserable around people. I am miserable around pathetic human vile people. I don't think anyone gets it and they overcomplicate what I am saying and they overthink and etc.I am sick of the people who say they understand but they don't and I am sick of the people who blame me for things and accuse me for things I am not doing and saying and etc. I ignore what people say and stuff but they never shut up and I don't care what they are saying. I am sick of people who think they are right but I am the one who is and they are wrong. I am sick of the people who argue with me. I don't get the point of people who argue. I don't understand it. I am not an empath and I am not a loving person. There were a lot of people who tried to define who I was in their minds but they were wrong and they were talking about someone else or maybe even themselves and they didn't even know me. They know themselves. I still don't understand why people talk to me and I don't want them to and I don't understand why they respond to what they say when I am not even talking to them in the first place. I am sick of my family talking about politics and Trump and I don't even like Trump and I didn't even vote for him. I hate him and he is the worst president. I hate my family so much. I never loved them. I am so mad at people who say that I should forgive but sometimes it is hard for me to forgive because the minute I forgive someone else does something horrible to me. I can't forgive any human for what they did. I already tried. It is hard. I hate my family so much because they talked about God, angels, and heaven. I don't believe in God, angels, and heaven. I am a proud atheist. I never believed in God, angels, and heaven. But I did fool people into thinking I did because I felt I didn't want to tell them the truth and I felt that I wanted to be more private. I hate people who criticize me and think that I am insecure and hiding myself and stuff like that. That is not the case at all. People just don't understand. I don't understand them and they don't understand me. So were even. People misunderstand me all the time. People will never understand me and it is not their life so why would they understand me. My life isn't supposed to make sense to anyone. But hate my mom because she doesn't get anything I said above and she doesn't understand anything because she forces me to believe what she does and she doesn't understand that people are different than her. She doesn't accept that people are different. I hate my mom because she tries to control and manipulate and she gets close to my face and she doesn't understand boundaries and respect and she is creepy. She makes me sick just like everyone else. I just really want people to shut up and stop talking because I am not listening and I don't care. I just pretend I am listening.