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I dont have any motivation to continue studying

My father said that I've never made them proud, not even once. Ever since I was in high school, I've always been a burden. Good grades? They don't care. Won competitions? Nope.


Back then, I was never really sure what major I should choose. They got angry at me because of that. But when I tell them what I want to be, they said "don't get influenced by people", "your dream is too high to achieve" and also got angry. I stopped telling them the majors I wish to study and then they also went mad because I went silent.


I don't know why, but I think they loved my brother more. No wonder, he's tall, relatively good looking (compared to me), doesn't care much about school (which is something my parents support, I guess). :)


They wont admit it, but I know. :)


He likes to make fun of me. My weight (because I was once fat), my height. My decisions. How I act. How I look. They were rarely angry. But when I complain about what he did, they said I'm too sensitive. They said that I should just shrug those off.


Goddamnit. I studied for more than 10 hours a day and this is what I get? "You never made us proud. Not even once"? Now what's the point of studying in college anyway? I'm not really interested in studying the major and eventually they will say I'm a burden too anyway. I guess I better stop studying :))))


Sure, yes, maybe I'm irritated and sad because of my puberty, ego, etc you name it but still, those words hurt. What my parents said hurts. What my brother said hurts.


Now I want to ask to parents in here

1. Do you care about your children's achievements in school?

2. Do you also get angry or be offended when your child is giving their opinion that differs from your opinion?

3. What will you say if your child was stressed? My father said "Being stressed is wrong. So wrong." Hehe and they went mad. Do you agree with him?


Do you think I need to talk to a psychiastrist? :/ or my irritation and stress are just normal phases of puberty?


Is what they said to me normal?



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Re: I dont have any motivation to continue studying

Hey,

Am no parent but i have had fair share of troubles because of my education. Well with asian parents, all asian kids have same story.. And for me i had over achiever cousins.. So yea life was a hell for me too... But where am i now? I surely out did anyones expectation.. Even mine and definitely my parents... I have done masters from the best college of my country and have offers for doctorate and am earning more than what i can spend.. So was i that bad student in first place? I was so bad in my highschool that i was forced to take extra classes and at home i would be locked inside my room by my parents because i wouldnt study much.. Those didnt help much, infact i got increasingly depressed and suicidal... But how did i change... I was always forced to do what my parents thought was best for me... I never had opinion... But along those depressed time i had a chance to introspect my life... What it means and what i want it to be in future... I realized why exactly my parents forced me to do these... And its when i felt like i had to make the move.. I had to make the decisions.. I started doing better... Then people looked forward to me.. And i loved it.. Because i wasnt doing out of neccesity.. I was doing it for me... The most important thing you need is ambition... Something to drive your life.. To live for... All your pains will take a backseat after it