I have no one to talk to, I mean, all the time. This is basically the reason I’m even writing this. My friends are doing in class school, actually going to school, while I’m at home doing online school. My parents made this rule that I’m not aloud to see anyone other than family, which really really sucks. The only time I’ve seen my friends is when my boy best friend and my other friend came to my house unexpectedly, and my parents made an exception to it. Then after a week or so, the friend that came to my house with my boy best friend unfriend me on Snapchat. My only communication to him. It hurt so much, knowing I didn’t do anything to him. I thought about what I could’ve done to make him unfriend me, and I couldn’t come up with any reason other than I text too much. A few of my friends say that, but they don’t understand what it’s like to see absolutely no one other than your family all day. I’m constantly thinking about how different it would be if I were at school with everyone else. This wouldn’t be happening to me. The people who make me whole are telling me I text too much. I don’t see anyone, I barely see the outside with corona going on. It’s wake up, school, homework, shower, bed. Every day. I miss them so much. They don’t seem to miss me. Some of my friends leave me on open, even after not seeing me for about 11 months to 6 months. I completely understand that everyone has their own stuff going on, and their own lives and responsibilities. I understand that life dosent revolve all around me. I understand this. I’m just so lonely, and it hurts so bad. Two of my friends went into online school for a month only, and during that month they got to see friends almost every other day. Sometimes they told me, and other times I saw on social media. I’ve lost touch with almost all the people I’m closest with. Not because I text too much, just because of something like my friend has a Samsung and I have an apple phone and we can’t communicate, or my friends parents took away her phone/ deleted an app like WhatsApp or Snapchat that we communicate with because of drama with other people. I’m so lonely, no one seems to care though. My mom is giving me an option to stay home for online school for the rest of year or go back to school after Christmas break. I’m thinking of staying home, because clearly the people who I call my “best friends” and the people I’m closest with can’t pick up the phone and call/ text me and have a small convo with me. It dosent even have to be a big conversation, it could just be about something like the weather. Something as small as that just makes me happy. So why would I go back to school to people who couldn’t care enough to pick up the phone and say hi after 7 months? I told my boy best friend and he told me to come back so we can laugh and have fun again. He cares. Nice to know someone cares :’). Going back to school also has drama too, that I am bound to be sucked into. And I have to adapt back to a completely new teacher and all that stuff. It’s so lonely though and I don’t know what to do. I draw to fill the time, but I want to do something else, like make my life more exciting, not just drawing, you know what I mean? But yeah. If your seeing this, have a awesome day and a great Christmas ❤️

I have no one to talk to, I mean, all the time. This is basically the reason I’m even writing this. My friends are doing in class school, actually going to school, while I’m at home doing online school. My parents made this rule that I’m not aloud to see anyone other than family, which really really sucks. The only time I’ve seen my friends is when my boy best friend and my other friend came to my house unexpectedly, and my parents made an exception to it. Then after a week or so, the friend that came to my house with my boy best friend unfriend me on Snapchat. My only communication to him. It hurt so much, knowing I didn’t do anything to him. I thought about what I could’ve done to make him unfriend me, and I couldn’t come up with any reason other than I text too much. A few of my friends say that, but they don’t understand what it’s like to see absolutely no one other than your family all day. I’m constantly thinking about how different it would be if I were at school with everyone else. This wouldn’t be happening to me. The people who make me whole are telling me I text too much. I don’t see anyone, I barely see the outside with corona going on. It’s wake up, school, homework, shower, bed. Every day. I miss them so much. They don’t seem to miss me. Some of my friends leave me on open, even after not seeing me for about 11 months to 6 months. I completely understand that everyone has their own stuff going on, and their own lives and responsibilities. I understand that life dosent revolve all around me. I understand this. I’m just so lonely, and it hurts so bad. Two of my friends went into online school for a month only, and during that month they got to see friends almost every other day. Sometimes they told me, and other times I saw on social media. I’ve lost touch with almost all the people I’m closest with. Not because I text too much, just because of something like my friend has a Samsung and I have an apple phone and we can’t communicate, or my friends parents took away her phone/ deleted an app like WhatsApp or Snapchat that we communicate with because of drama with other people. I’m so lonely, no one seems to care though. My mom is giving me an option to stay home for online school for the rest of year or go back to school after Christmas break. I’m thinking of staying home, because clearly the people who I call my “best friends” and the people I’m closest with can’t pick up the phone and call/ text me and have a small convo with me. It dosent even have to be a big conversation, it could just be about something like the weather. Something as small as that just makes me happy. So why would I go back to school to people who couldn’t care enough to pick up the phone and say hi after 7 months? I told my boy best friend and he told me to come back so we can laugh and have fun again. He cares. Nice to know someone cares :’). Going back to school also has drama too, that I am bound to be sucked into. And I have to adapt back to a completely new teacher and all that stuff. It’s so lonely though and I don’t know what to do. I draw to fill the time, but I want to do something else, like make my life more exciting, not just drawing, you know what I mean? But yeah. If your seeing this, have a awesome day and a great Christmas ❤️

hey love:)i totally get it. no, really. ive been there and am kind of still there hahha.here's some advice on what i learned-i overthink. whenever i see that someone left me on open i immediately try and remember what i sent them. if i sent them something offensive by accident or if i snapped them too soon and they think im being clingy. i never branch out and really think about what happens on their end. they could be with family and weren't supposed to have their phone and got caught. their phone could have died right then and there or they could have just wanted to open and not respond. NOTHING personal.now, here's the big step that you need to take to feel better ! be unbothered. that's it.DONT CARE about how long they left you on open. if you asked them a question and they didn't answer it, forget about it and ask someone else. you don't actually NEED anybody to be happy. we always just WANT somebody to MAKE us happy. friends are great, yeah, but brutal honesty... those people aren't your friends from what i read. i know it hurts. i really do. i hurt. but then, i found my best friend who makes me happy everyday. she never makes me wonder if i did something wrong because we communicate about it. when she leaves me on open i laugh because i know she's doing it on purpose. when im sad, or have drama i tell her and we gossip about it lol.go to school after break and find people who make you feel that way. happy and safe. OR, find yourSELF. be unbothered. be your own best friend. which, by the way, you already should be:), but if you aren't already, find your best friend at school or online, and find yourself with them. or vice versa.i wish you the best. you're strong asf.ily&lt;3merry christmas &amp; happy new year💖

hey love:)i totally get it. no, really. ive been there and am kind of still there hahha.here's some advice on what i learned-i overthink. whenever i see that someone left me on open i immediately try and remember what i sent them. if i sent them something offensive by accident or if i snapped them too soon and they think im being clingy. i never branch out and really think about what happens on their end. they could be with family and weren't supposed to have their phone and got caught. their phone could have died right then and there or they could have just wanted to open and not respond. NOTHING personal.now, here's the big step that you need to take to feel better ! be unbothered. that's it.DONT CARE about how long they left you on open. if you asked them a question and they didn't answer it, forget about it and ask someone else. you don't actually NEED anybody to be happy. we always just WANT somebody to MAKE us happy. friends are great, yeah, but brutal honesty... those people aren't your friends from what i read. i know it hurts. i really do. i hurt. but then, i found my best friend who makes me happy everyday. she never makes me wonder if i did something wrong because we communicate about it. when she leaves me on open i laugh because i know she's doing it on purpose. when im sad, or have drama i tell her and we gossip about it lol.go to school after break and find people who make you feel that way. happy and safe. OR, find yourSELF. be unbothered. be your own best friend. which, by the way, you already should be:), but if you aren't already, find your best friend at school or online, and find yourself with them. or vice versa.i wish you the best. you're strong asf.ily<3merry christmas & happy new year💖