Thing is that I’m gay, and my home is very religious and they’d expect me to live a "normal" life but I know that’s not what I want, but at the same time it is. Sometimes I ask myself why am I like this? I know that I can never come out to them, only a few friends of mine know. I’m fact my whole community is just so religious and I have no one to talk to about this. I do somewhat believe in god and maybe this is just a bigger test for me, but this is just so unfair, I want love and I want to be accepted, but at the same time I want a normal life. It’s wrong that I keep holding on to the thought of someone of the opposite gender changing my mind in the future and what if that doesn’t even happen? I’m lost and I can’t find my way out.