I don’t know why I feel like I do. I feel like I’m trapped in my own mind of thoughts that loop into anxiety. I think about how I’m not living my life to it’s fullest at all and I could be doing so much better but all I do is play video games all day and rewatch YouTube videos. I don’t know why I’m not liked. I’m a normal person and I care for others but apparently that’s just not what anyone wants in their life. I don’t know why my family has to be so toxic. My parents always yelling at my brother, and my brother yelling back and fighting. I don’t know why life is so bland. I can’t find a new hobby because nothing interests me, not even my phone or video games anymore. I don’t know why I have thoughts of suicide when I don’t want to. It makes me uncomfortable knowing that I have the ability to do that. I don’t know why I keep thinking of my future too much. I realize that I never know when I’m gonna die, and eventually I will no matter what I do. I don’t know why, and I never will. Life feels like a simulation, and it feels artificial.