Before starting to write this I want to mention that I am not happy with all the things I did, if I could take it back, I would.So basically it all started on junior year of highschool. A girl had a crush on me since freshman, that I didn't really care that she liked me. But I'm dumb and in highschool so I started to go to parties get drunk and do dumb stuff. So basically during half a year I played with her (I'm so sorry for this to this day). During that year we had many fights because she saw what I was doing and she was hurt, but she still had a crush on me. So I told myself, what if I try to be in a relationship with her, like go on dates and be together. So during the rest of the year I tried to get to know her and starting putting my effort in to make something work. But she wasn't at all my type, not to be shitty but we were not a match. So I never truly told her what I was trying at the time, i never said I liked her or that I loved her so nothing really ever started so I didn't had to end anythingSo I went on with my life, but she starts being a little weird with me. She starts going to my soccer matches and grabbing my hand and I'm so confused. We were not together at all so I just avoided her as much as possible. (I didn't mention that during highschool we became very close friends, so I didn't really want to lose her friendship so I didn't want to hurt her feelings).Almost ending that year I started dating another girl and it was going to be official, and the girl that had a crush on me started ignoring me. I thought that it hurt her to see me with someone else so she had to take her time to feel better so I didn't go talk to her. Later I noticed she was going abroad to study a whole semester and she was going to leave mad at me, and I couldn't allow that. So last day of school I went to talk to her and she told me literally this "why didn't you tell me". So I'm thinking well because it's my business not anybody else's and besides your my friend no my girlfriend. So we stopped being friends. And to me it really hurts to lose a friend so I was hurt. Before she went to study abroad she messaged me that she wanted to talk before she left so we could fix our friendship.When we met, in summary she said she had a problem with my existence but know all good, friends again. I'm like great we keep in touch, and left. So later that day she messaged me and tells me she didn't finish with our talk so in another summary she tells me this "you cheated on me, it was wrong, you broke me in million pieces, your toxic and I had to find myself". So im very confused by that message because we were never together. So I answered in the mature route telling her " I don't agree with most of what you said but I'm happy for you that you found yourself and hope your happy".So I thought maybe we are still friends, until she started telling people that I'm shit and a cheater that I couldn't be trusted. And I'm so confused because I thought we were okay now. So I literally told her to fuck off and I lost friends because of her allegations.I regret many things I did with the influence of alcohol and mostly the way I treated her before she became crazy in my opinion. One year has passed from this. I'm in a very happy relationship with someone else and I could say that I love her. But I can't get this story or this girl off my mind, I kind of hate her. I get kind of sad when I think of this even though I don't know why. And I feel really bad because I'm still thinking of this other girl despite the fact that I'm in a relationship. Don't know what to do but this days are getting harder every day and I wish this never happensMaybe this sounds very immature but it's something I want to get off my chest because I can't tell no one about thisI know I messed up many times even more than the ones I mention in this story but I am truly sorry and I regret it so much.