Time Spent- 25m 57s
16 Visitors

I DONT WANT YOUR PITY

I'm waiting on my deadline. I do not enjoy my life to any degree. I am extremely uncomfortable with how I look, and i feel as if my days are just waking up to a fresh, gut wrenching problem for me to stress out about.. I'm on a self-destructive, spiral downfall path of life. I can't commit now or within the near future because I have 5 little brothers. While I am probably as distant as I can be with them, I know it would do some type of psychological damage if I were to just off myself while they're at such an impressionable age. I think either my game plan is to disappear out of state for awhile after I can convince myself I can no longer be of service to my family, wait till I'm distant memory and then lights out. The only thing that keeps weighing on me is my parents. I rarely speak to them but its one way streak. They contact me on a monthly basis, so their has to be some type of "love" or reason for them to call. I don't know, its a lose-lose situation