My (online) boyfriend (now ex as of yesterday) and I had a pretty good relationship. Nothing really bad has been happening.We both are super into metal music, punk, goth, playing the bass guitar. We bonded over music and art.But when we first began dating I noticed he had a knife collection as well as, he posted pictures of dead animals or roadkill on his Instagram.I thought this was just him being edgy, since we’re both teenagers and metalheads. I didn’t think anything of it. Teen boys being teen boys, right? Well…He told me he has been to a mental hospital but never told me why. I didn’t ask because I did not want to invade his personal life with questions. I know how it is to have your mental state questioned and I of course did not want to be ‘that’ person.We began having video call sessions a bit. I noticed he was looking around as if someone was there. He talked to himself and made strange noises, talked fast and jumped from subject to subject.I wasn’t sure if this was Mania or Schizophrenia. I asked him about it and he was defensive. I got super scared because it was getting bad. I began crying and I left the call and I asked if he had a mental illness because I care about him. He said he was joking several times.I forgave him.Our relationship was smooth and amazing. No red flags besides those.Until he made jokes about ab*se to me. As well as s**ual assault jokes.I told him I did not appreciate it and he of course said, “I’m kidding! Can you not take a joke?”I forgave him again.A few days ago he said he wanted for us to take a break because he is struggling with depression. I agreed somewhat because I grew overwhelmed and stressed from our relationship. I asked him if he wanted help getting through this depression because I too experienced it and got over it a bit. He declined and got upset at me for asking.But he also talked about break up.We fought pretty bad.Yesterday I decided to check up on him to see if his mental health was any better because I care. Typical girlfriend, you know?Well, I tell him regardless if we don’t end up dating I just would like to get along and be friends and I’m sorry for lashing out at him.He responds with “Okay”.He is extremely sarcastic and not serious.I question him about why he has treated me poorly in the past and if he’s proud for breaking my heart.He says he is followed with a graphic paragraph about him being so joyful he… O-gasms. Annnnnd yeah!He also sent audio of him… Which I can assume is him doing just that. I never listened because I didn’t want to give him the time of day.I say screw it. I tell him off and block him.He objectified me, made cruel jokes about me, accused me of not taking ‘jokes’.I tell my friends everything, show them the texts. They all block him as well.One friend of mine sends a screenshot to me of my ex’s bio. He still has my username or me tagged with a heart like we did when we were together.He still has it, even now.Am I the bad person for blocking him and breaking up with him for all of this?What the hell was he thinking?? (Not literally).I mean… Why did he pull this for so long? ‘Loved’ me for so long?I don’t understand.I still cannot tell what disorder he has…I did not break up with him because of his mental illness, I broke up with him because how he treated me.I’m gonna take a looooooong break until I’m in my 20s, man. Guess I really should listen to family saying Online love usually ends up bad, and to wait for relationships once I’m mature.At least it gives me time to work on myself as well as my musician journey. I noticed relationships tend to get in the way with it for me.No more online stuff that’s for damn sure.I’m alright, just in shock.Needless to say, I did block him, change my username and set my account to Private.Thank you for reading.What a great way to start the new year, eh?