I feel noting. I'm numb almost all the time and i've relied on self harm to feel something these days. I don't want to have to rely o this kinda thing to feel something.
No one asks me if i'm okay anymore and it makes me feel like i'm unwanted and even more alone than i've ever been. All i want is for someone to reach out and ask me if i'm okay. It would mean the world to me and i feel as if i would breakdown from just hearing those words. Its been 3 years since anyone's ever truly cared about my feelings or mental health due to the fact that i'm just the funny friend that's always happy and never sad. I'm always there for everyone else but no ones ever there for me.
I get called a faggot everyday because i'm a bisexual, trans male living in a homophobic town. My parents say they accept be but i can see the disappointment in their eyes. I'm not even out as trans but i always have the feeling that when i do i'm going to be kicked out at the age of 15. I would be surprised if they didn't kick me out honestly.
All f this makes my lay in bed at night wondering why ill never be enough for anyone.