vent
spirit
rut
relationship

I just need to vent

Time Spent- 1h 31m
22 Visitors

I've been in a relationship for almost four years now with my highschool sweetheart. When he was going through the Fire Academy (FA) he had to study his ass off because he's dyslexic and has a really hard time sponging everything he needs to soak up. With COVID-19 happening he had to put his schooling on pause because they weren't offering the course he needed. Especially since it's EMR, you know that's a hands on requirement. Anyways, It's almost been a year since he graduated the FA and he hasn't touched up on his studies. I asked him yesterday when the last time he studied and apparently it's not my place.


Look I'm attending an online university right now for OUR life together. Just last week I spent 52 hours on my laptop just studying. And he's always going on about how we give equal effort to our relationship. Right now If he could put 10% in and I'd be happy. But currently all he does is play on his Xbox and watch anime. He's become stagnant and lazy. There's more behind the scenes but I don't want to get into it. Maybe he's in a rut but he doesn't talk to me about what he feels. UUUUUUUUGH all I ask out of him is for him to try his best. When he failed some of his test for the FA all I asked was "Did you try your best" and if he said yes I'd respond with a "Then I'm proud of you..." Like that's how I was raised. All I want is for him to be his best, which may seem like a lot to ask of a person, but up until july 2020 he did give me his best.


He's just in a rut and he will get out of it because he's a strong spirit. I just hope it's soon. I do love him and I'm not going anywhere. It feels nice to find a place where I can vent because I can't do that here.