TW/// sexual assault. i was thirteen at the time and it lasted up until i turned 14. he was 16 and turned 15. he was a big part of my friend group and my sister and i had been friends with him for years. he had a girlfriend and had been dating her for well over a year. he started being overly nice to me and offering me cuddles whenever i was sad. i just thought this was a nice thing he was doing to make me feel better but it slowly progressed into him begging for nudes. it was the slow manipulation that i had given into that lasted for months. up until he was screenshoting my nudes and calling me a little slut every time i didnt want to send. this was a daily thing and i never caught a break. i just wanted male validation and to be loved and i thought this was the only way. i wouldnt eat for weeks because of the things he would say about my body and how he made me feel about myself. every time we hung out my anxiety would be through the roof to the point where i would walk info of everyone so they couldn't see the tears rolling down my face. it was something i felt i would get in trouble for and i felt it was all my fault. i almost took my life so many times and i just thought it would never end. i didnt open up to anyone about this unit recently and i have had many helpful friends help me through it and i even have a boyfriend now who i love and am very happy with, but i still cry about it all the time and it is always in the back of my mind. i just want a voice and i want to feel like i am not alone and l need to know this is not my fault. i left out many aspects to the story and i did not go into full detail because its. sad and i cant write about it without crying so im not going to. just please spread awareness.