a few years ago I was in a new relationship with this guy (I'll call him Joe) but I still had feelings for another guy (I'll call him Paul) that I was in the same friend group with at the time. So while I'm dating Joe I get invited to Paul's birthday party and tell Joe I'm busy because at this point I was having second thoughts about the relationship. I get to Paul's birthday party with my friends and I see that his ex gf is there and they flirt the whole night. The minute I saw them together I got jealous and drank myself into oblivion. I got to the verge of blackout by 3 am. By this time a lot of people had left or went to hookup somewhere. I kept drinking with one of my close friends (I'll call him Ian) and he confesses that he has liked me for a while and that he wants to take me out. My drunk ass ends up making out with him and all my friends find out about it. The next day Paul found out and had a screaming match with Ian and then told me to never talk to him again. Paul was my past summer fling and I had no idea he still had feelings for me so I was shook. What's crazy is at this point my ACTUAL BF Joe had no idea that any of this went on and still doesn't know to this day. I broke up with him a week after the birthday party. I then tried to talk to Paul to see if we should give things another shot be he was always indecisive about us so I decided to move on. My dumbass started going out with Ian a week after I had talked with Paul and broke up with Joe. Ian and I ended up being on an off for two years until a few months ago and we are still in the same friend group. The CRAZIEST PART is that the reason Ian and I are over now is because one of his friends from high school (I'll call him Max) and I ended up liking each other and became exclusive for the summer. Recently I made a TERRIBLE mistake and madeout with Ian again when I was black out drunk. I instantly regretted it. yesterday I told Max about it in person and it made me feel so bad. We worked things out but I think at this point I need to learn my lesson and stay out of love triangles. I just really needed to confess this because it's just so fucking crazy to me the way everything turned out. writing it out made me realize how weird the situation is.