People believe so much, people have a lot of faith in things, but I've lost that, and so the way I mourn is by bullying others about their foolishness. It makes me really happy that others feel sad or feel the way I want them to be and that's just nice. It's very weird to manipulate people because I don't even know if I'm doing it correctly, all I know is that can't control it. It's really hard to live this way, people judge me for being who I am but I don't really know what to do about it. It's hard to stop manipulating too.
This confession may be disconnected and confusing. But it's really helpful for me to let something out like this.