you know what? fuck you. fuck you for making me feel like it was all my fault, and fuck myself for actually tearing myself apart because of it. you don’t know. you don’t have any idea what i went through when you said your last goodbye. i sat there hating myself. blaming myself for everything, and convincing myself that i deserve every single bit of pain that i receive because i had hurt you. you say it’s been years and that i need to get over it and move on, but really? it’s you that needs to get over it and move on. i’ve said sorry, i’ve admitted to making a mistake and hurting you, i took full responsibility for my fault, and still, you are the one still blaming me for what happened to you. all i want. all i really want. is for you to forgive me. i’m not asking for you to let me back into your life. i don’t want that. i want to know that what happened between us has been accepted and forgiven so i can properly move forward without constantly blaming myself, because truth is, it wasn’t all my fault. you hurt me pretty good too, but you still think that your feelings are more validated than mine. the worst part, though? i still miss you. despite everything, despite all the time that has passed, you are still always on my mind. i wish we could set aside every bad thing for just one moment, and actually talk to one another. i wish. i wish you felt the same way too.