I don't know how to start. I want to die? Like everyday I feel like I just want to end it all. No more thoughts nor feelings. All my friends think I have no problems and that I'm always happy and that hurts. I don't want to weigh my problems on others and I just want to be happy. I go home every day, knowing that ill probably feel depressed or want to die. My dad hits me, and I think he has either anger issues or bipolar disorder. I share a room with my 7-year-old sister and all my siblings hate me. Everyone in my life sees me as carefree and happy, when inside I'm depressed. Sometimes I wish I was in America, so I could just shoot my bloody self and for it to all be over. If someone wants to help me out by, killing me my address is: England, Nottingham NG9 3QH. My bedrooms on the top floor and i am 12. I look older tho.
Re: I need help
i know it’s hard to read advice from a complete stranger, someone who cannot understand the depth of what you’re going through, but you have to know that life gets better. Eventually. Even i haven’t found much to be happy about in life, which is why i vent on this slightly dodgy website, but i’m still only 14 and i know that i won’t feel like this forever.
We can’t begin to understand now, but if we tell people about our experiences, people that might be able to help, the weight can be lifted slightly off our shoulders and it becomes easier to get through.
I know you will probably dismiss this, like most people i know would, but Childline is available for anyone to use and they have safety procedures that protect you from other people seeing it as a tab or a phone call. You can tell them your thoughts (maybe not all of it if you don’t want to right away) and they can help you get through this. Don’t give up. Your life us worth more than that.
Re: I need help
When u feel depressed look at the people who live a life worse than yours. Try to find things that you have others dont. And I'm sure you'll find at least 2 or 3. Trust me there are many beautiful things waiting for you. Your still young and many would do anything to go back in time to your age. You have a lot of time to change your life. Find things that make you feel happy. Start my helping others and see how it feels. The fact that you are healthy simply makes you privileged. You will see life beautiful if u give yourself a chance to be happy
Re: I need help
What you’ve described is an incredibly difficult thing for anyone to go through, let alone someone your age. I’m barely older than you, I’m just 14, and I have no idea how I’d cope with this situation, you’re doing incredibly well and I’m so glad you’re still here.
Please try your hardest to stay strong, fuck everyone else. You did absolutely nothing wrong, you aren’t a burden, and it’s important you stay here. Family isn’t always blood, family can be chosen, and it already sounds like you have a group of friends, and they’d want to know you’re safe and doing okay.
I want you to know I care about your life. If you don’t feel like you can open up to any of your friends, my insta is mia_ems_xx and I really wanna talk with you :)
you seem really intelligent from your message and you just seem like a generally cool person, please message me so you can have a safe space to chat and I can know that you’re okay <3
The Samaritans is also a good option if you wanna talk, they legally can’t tell anyone anything you told them, so you can know your secrets are safe. But please do contact me. Lots of love <3