Been trying for years to change my life. I’ve sought therapy and tried to do the things I wanted for the last dacade. My situation hasn’t changed and I’m so ready to quit. I’m tired of being ignored, talked over, and left alone while everybody around me are having the times of their lives. I’m tired of this shitty job that I can’t leave because of COVID. I can’t save much money to move. I don’t have the energy to do anything anymore. Lately, I’ve lost track of days. I’m tired. Demoralized. Lonely. Defeated. People have better, more supportive families and friends. I feel like I can’t talk to anyone about how I feel. I don’t feel like anyone really like me, I’m just there for convenience. My family doesn’t understand my depression enough to be encouraging. No one spends time with me, but I’m always going out of my way for them. All my friends are gone. I’m pretty sure most grew up and forgot about me. The ones that care are thousands of miles and an ocean away. Online, I get lost in chat groups to the point where people will barely notice. I play games by myself. I draw by myself. I’m just by myself. I Feel like I don’t have a likable personality to keep trying to make friends. I can’t have the things I need to be happy. I’ve tried to endure it until things changed, but plans keep falling apart. I’m tired of crying almost every week. I wish I could just pass in my sleep and not have to wake up anymore.