i ruined my relationship w my mom

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my mom keeps telling me that being a lesbian is a phase,, and she keep comparing it to drugs sex and bad shit. she tells me that i "act american" (we're from the middle east) because im "emotionless" when i just dont want to talk to her. she yells at me all the time and kept shaming me about how i changed ? like i was a sweet little girl and now im just a bad person when i didnt do anything wrong. i cant keep any secrets from her because she goes through all my privacy. i said some hurtful words that i hate her, and that she's the worst mother in the world and all that shit. but im still crying even after how she acted and i dont agree with her at all,, i still feel like i lost her forever. we used to be so close and now its ruined and i just feel sad and angry and confused lmao